What is perfect? Webster’s definition “being entirely without fault or defect” The example given was a flawless diamond. I realized when I asked myself this question, I drew a blank.
I have been struggling with not feeling like I am doing life right, like I am not good enough. I described to my friend, how hard it was to get my message out, and she asked me…. Was what I was sharing authentic. Or… perfect? That really stopped me in my tracks. I authentically had a message and a purpose, a mission to support First Responders. Yet, I kept feeling I was doing it wrong. I finally got to the place that uncorked it all. I had no definition of perfect. I was comparing myself to a measuring stick I was not able to see. If there was a defined “perfect” parameter, I could work toward it. Sounds simple, right? In the rational part of my brain I understood this. For me growing up with a narcissistic father, nothing I did ever seemed to be enough, even when I was successful or did something great it was belittled or something else would have been better. I have continued to replay this in my head over and over. Like a dog chasing a tail that can never be caught.
The next part is where I figured it out. I had been spending my life being unique, and constantly measuring my uniqueness to the perfect I could never achieve. Well mind blown! I am perfectly unique. In many cultures there are references to imperfections in art, purposefully created by the artist. It symbolizes that only God is perfect and there is still beauty in imperfections. Back to the flawless diamond definition. I wear my grandmothers wedding ring diamond as a necklace. It has a rather large black flaw in it. I see it as the way I know this is her diamond. If it were perfect or flawless, how could I distinguish it from another?
Our uniqueness is our gifts and comparing ourselves to perfect…. Whatever that is to you, is not a way to measure our worth.
Do you struggle with perfection? Give me a call and we can discuss it.
“People always try to be perfect. That’s why they don’t start anything. Perfection is the lowest standard in the world. Because if you’re trying to be perfect, you know you can’t be. So what you really have is a standard you can never achieve. You want to be outstanding, not perfect.
– TONY ROBBINS